View Quotes

"I thought you were Chinese?" - Qais S
jack got an italian sandwich

"No cup holder, fine, fine, fine." - Qais S
jack's new bmw

"Your man cave is the bathroom." - Cindy O
mike

"Especially in the bad weather. They're like, 'no, I'll melt'." - Denny J
her dogs don't like going outside in the rain

"You're shooting blanks and she can't have puppies." - Mike O
wiki trying to mount leah

"Some of these are doosies." - Andrea T

"I'm pretty sure I did that in college." - Denny J
a card in cards against humanity

"She's got good arms." - Denny J
michelle obama's arms card in cah

"How many does she got over there?" "I'm not telling." - Cindy O & Denny J
denny was really good at cah

"I think that was mine." - Ivy J

"I had teeth in third grade." - Ivy J

"Put some mice turds on it..." - Uncle Mike
bri's computers at work are old & no one wants to have them

"I was so glad nobody ate it." - Aunt Janet
the chicken salad at christmas; it was good

"I don't think that's asking too much." - Aunt Janet
tv's everywhere for football

"I just want a utility car. Like a Corvette." - Uncle Mike

"So... the big C, that's for Green Bay?" - Uncle Mike
the big c on the field in chicago

"Oh, he showed his mustache, yay!" - Aunt Janet

"Donut! Donut! Jelly inside! Hike!" - Uncle Mike
play call in football

"I wanna say more than nine, less than eleven..." - Uncle Mike
how many weeks aaron rogers was out

"If you scream, scream outside." - Aunt Janet

"Go get drunk. Better sex." - Shawn R

"I wanna f**k you tonight." - Shawn R

"They know me." - Shawn R
trying to give jen the goat

"Can I help you?" "Yes." - Jen R & Shawn R

"You've said that several times..." - Shawn R

"So you're going to enter this po-dunk down..." - Janny M
giving my sister directions; she locked her doors when i said this

"Really I look good? For an old broad?" - Aunt Ruth

"And now we're trying to off-shore." "Yeah, that'll work. What could go wrong?" - Brian C & Uncle Mike
bri's work

"I'll come down to you." - Mike A
to give someone a hug since he's so tall

"It's like Asian women smell..." - Uncle Mike

"That's a lemeric. We're talking about rhymes." - Stacy M

"Dylan's got a different death star." - Roshy R
on his shirt; aunt janet got them matching shirts

"Too late, they're already dead." - Dylan R

"You don't like to watch ice skaters fall?" - Stacy M
the olympics

"Sorry don't cut it when I'm dead." - John C
a lady almost hit us in the parking lot then waved

"Baby, come back to my place and I'll show you... the little engine that could." - Brian C

"Well who was nothing?" - Mike O

"How am I compensating for my tiny penis?" - Cindy O

"Which includes a Matthew McConaughey blow up doll." - Kurt W

"C*m had to come in there somewhere." - Brian C

"Too many words." - Mike O
one of the cah cards

"Before Leah gets off..." - Kurt W

"Wait. Who's turn is it?" "Yours!" - Janny M & Brian C & Cindy O
yours said at the same time

"Smells like dirty a*s." - Mike O

"See? I got the beer can in there... that means we're having fun!" - Janny M
picture

"Exactly what a lush would say." "Suck it." - Kurt W & Mike O

"I was trying to feel around for it." "That's what she said." "I was just going to say that." - Janny M & Brian C & Matt Wi

"If it's an onion ring, it's going down." - Megan Wi
her engagement ring

"Okay, you must be beautiful or something." - Megan Wi

"Rani, again, had to go see strippers..." - Erin L

"We could mix it with vinegar." - Erin L
the vodka they had; they didn't have anything to mix it with

"What the penis is mine? Mine didn't closely resemble a penis." - Matt Wi
that's scribblish

"He's a man cause he has a penis." - Megan Wi

"How do you end a snowball fight with a penis?" - Megan Wi

"They only have one boner?" - Janny M

"I don't look good with just a mustache." "No. Nobody does." - Brian C & Matt Wi

"Salt does something magical to it." - Erin L

"T J Max, my ass." - Erin L
people walking in the road

"So you're saying he played himself?" - Matt Wi
leonardo decaprio in what's eating gilbert grape

"That's where truck b***hes sit." - Megan Wi

"I'm not making judgements, I'm just keeping them to myself." - Abby M

"My bad. I'm blowing the booze for no reason." - Adam M

"There are different levels of stupid." - Tim M

"Who dresses these men?" - Janny M
sports commentators

"What about the pink one?" - Megan Wi
she really liked the pink tie one guy was wearing

"Nepolian was a faker, too." - Megan Wi
sharing stories about our dogs

"You know, cause your feed get tired..." - Megan Wi

"I had balls." - Megan Wi

"Wow what are we gonna do with these fifteen apples?" "Uh, eat them as apple pie." - Megan Wi & Matt Wi

"Is he dead? Did he die?" - Megan Wi

"May I have a pointy knife?" - Person At Party 12/14/2013

"I thought it was an hour per pound..." - Megan Wi
so a 24 pound turkey would take 24 hours to cook?

"This T V is pretty s**ty." - Wilson M
megan wanted to get another crappy gift for the white elephant

"What did you think you were a guest?" - Megan Wi
putting her friend to work

"I can't read my own hand writing." - Megan Wi

"That's like a bedroom sized fun dip." - Megan Wi

"When did I start hanging out with alcoholics?" - Megan Wi
the booze in the white elephant went fast & kept getting stolen

"It's a good read." - Matt Wi
intro to property book

"That's five dolla!" - Jade G

"This is my mom's favorite clock!" - Jade G
she stole it from me, that's good!

"Did you need the battery?" - Megan Wi
why wilson gave the clock

"Which one's your car?" - Jade G
so she can do something bad to it

"I'm gonna fog it." "What a horrible idea." - Megan Wi & Matt Wi
before their christmas tree comes in their house

"Megan doesn't joke about dildos." - Person At Party 12/14/2013

"I'm not talking about Spanish people." - Megan Wi

"I'm not like a fashion person..." - Charlie K

"He's gonna blame me because he thinks that I'm this giant lush..." - Kathy W

"Shut up, Wynne... Okay. Good. I will." - Wynne G

"You have big balls." - Bill K
talking to brian about his bowling balls

"It would have just a little bump." "Well I don't want little bumps in my car." - Mike O & Cindy O
mike was driving cindy's car

"Only when you pluck your butt hairs... I'll bring you a few." - Mike O

"Sammy, your wet." "That's what he said." - Kurt W & Brian C

"Where are his balls?" - Kurt W
removed?

"S**t. Skank ho." - Mike O

"I will take the two on top." - Kurt W
he was taking forever to decide so we wanted to give him the 2 on top; but he took them anyway after

"We don't want to play rope!" - Mike O
leah

"Is this safe?" - Jack Z
driving with john

"No more smiles for her." - Brie Be
someone ignored her when she said hi

"Cause Jack wanted kung pow chicken at the deli..." - Qais S
jack doesn't like the deli across the street

"I don't know if you were trying to draw attention to yourself." - Megan Wi

"I don't like anything that's heart shaped... it's so fake." - Megan Wi

"It works fine. It's great. It's my favorite one." - Megan Wi
matt fixed something very personal to her

"I saw the bell. I'm good." - Megan Wi
no more going to philly for her

"What? I believe in the movies." - Matt Wi
megan always says matt doesn't believe in things

"He is so good looking. Matt, you better pay attention." - Megan Wi

"You don't believe in making cookies either." - Megan Wi
matt