View Quotes

"There's not enough alcohol in this house." - Janny M
matt drawing his whole hand in dominion

"Undo it! Undo it." - Matt Wi

"This is gonna f**k me so hard." - Matt Wi

"I think they're gonna die." - Matt Wi
his troops in risk

"It's bulls**t. I'm not paying it." - Matt Wi
we told him the cost of $13 for bowling but it was really $13.89; he didn't want to pay 89 cents

"Oh s**t. That's like twenty five miles per hour. I can't go faster than that." - Matt Wi
throwing a ball in bowling

"Twenty miles per hour is pretty fricken hard to throw." - Matt Wi

"God damn it. I'm running out of space!" - Janny M

"Although twenty plus is pretty hard to throw." - Matt Wi
still he was talking about this?

"In the vagina? Where does it go?" - Matt Wi
the balls were disappearing

"Well I guess I see you guys and you see people..." - Matt Wi
the deadly virus going around... they don't see many people

"When you play the bird, you get more s**t." - Brian C

"Matt... are you sober?" "Meh." - Janny M & Matt Wi

"I feel like they should be in their own bucket..." - Matt Wi
food in wingspan

"I don't care. There's like three turns left." - Matt Wi
why we shouldn't bother putting stuff in their own containers

"Well I don't have some hole in the wall, Chinese place..." - Sébastien T
to get his hair cut; his wife does it

"Can you close my face?" - Sébastien T
webex on the screen

"It doesn't take me much alcohol to dance." - Adam J

"Now I need to see some evidence that you got done these things." - Jason H
colonoscopy

"You gotta know how to shave the cat." "Excuse me?" - Uncle Neil & Jason H

"I don't know if I can bring myself to drive a Prius." - Dr Dana W

"It has multiple personalities." "Like you do." - Brian C & Dr Dana W

"We live on a post card." - Ash P
it is pretty where they live

"Seriously? We're gonna bring Tim Tebow out as the gospel?" - Ash P

"F**k Joe Biden. Seriously. Die in a fire. F**k Joe Biden." - Ash P

"A New York Korean Jew..." - Ash P
elizabeth warren meme

"I'm a professional alcoholic." - Ash P

"You don't put temptation in front of a sinner." - Dr Dana W

"She is a hold out!" - Dr Dana W
her grandmother won't die

"This is the house I want." "That just sold?" - Dr Dana W & Brian C

"Come on. In or out." "That's what she said." - Dr Dana W & Janny M
brodie won't make up his mind

"S**t, that's awesome. I wanna kill someone with a saw blade!" - Dr Dana W

"We were alive for this one!" - Dr Dana W
a card in the trivia game we were playing

"He's like, 'nope, nope. I'm seventy pounds. I'm not moving.'" - Dr Dana W
brodie; big dog

"So I have no idea if I'm on track to retire when I'm ninety seven." - Dr Dana W

"Break it into six movies. Seriously." - Dr Dana W
lord of the rings

"It's a sad life." - Dr Dana W

"Wait! So more jobs? Uh!" - Dr Dana W

"Brodie has the wild eyes like I'm going to kill you but I'm not sure how." - Ash P

"Cat genie's are racist." - Ash P
cat genies don't work with black cats

"How do you use the wrong button? There are only two or three buttons." - Matt Wi

"It was like eighty five degrees and we had all the windows open..." - Matt Wi
their downstairs tenants used to have the heat on really hot in the winter

"Matt... ten seconds..." "That's what she said." - Brian C & Megan Wi

"Ugh. You got me a yellow one? Nasty!" - Megan Wi
popsickle

"So it helps to stay on the ground cause then you can drive." - Matt Wi
playing a playstation game

"It's kinda hard to move when you don't have friction." - Matt Wi
playing a playstation game

"Go. Get it in, Matt. Jeez!" "That's what she said." - Megan Wi & Janny M
get the ball into the goal

"She looks like a man." - Megan Wi
mariska hargitay

"Most people are white still?" - Matt Wi

"Oh, come on. You leaked the story!" - Ed F
klobachar; during the debate

"Does she work for the Chamber of Commerce?" - Randall L
klobachar

"Atlanta is a plantation town... What happens when you take away slavery?" - Randall L
same kinda question about fracking

"I have more black friends than you." - Helen E
joe biden

"So are you pookie bear?" - Brian C
asking a lady who knew the dueling piano's song that was dedicated to pookie bear

"Looks like poop." - Jen R

"The only triple A's are in our vibrator." - Shawn R
the batteries they have

"Haha. You said nuts." - Shawn R

"My parents were... pretty good parents." - Brian C
when it came to puberty

"That's a lot of pressure." "That's what she said." - Long D & Bryan S
for the first quote of the decade

"Oh my God. Florida men are so fun!" - Helen E

"Florida is Leisure World on steroids." - Helen E

"It's not what it looked like..." - Helen E
smuggled something

"It was in Georgia and not the state..." - Helen E

"You know when you're a dealer, what do you expect?" - Bryan S

"Are you really gonna argue this with a demographer?" - Bryan S

"Here. Eat stuff." - Bryan S
more food

"Oh, Bryan. I'm so sorry. I drank all your bourbon." "That's okay. I have scotch." - Janny M & Bryan S
i drank the rest of his bourbon

"I've been eating grapes and cookies... Does that mean I'm pregnant?" - Helen E

"I can't trust you. You might eat something." "No, I'm not." - Janny M & Helen E

"I'm not really a communist but..." - Helen E

"You don't have any two dimensional chickens." - Bryan S

"So, which part? Are you young or are you a gentrifier?" - Bryan S

"Nobody likes Trump." - Bryan S

"I am sober, I'm telling you." - Helen E

"What lane are you telling me?" "Um... New Hampshire." - Brian C & Helen E