View Quotes

"Do you want this down your pants?" "Well, I have pretty baggy pants so..." - Brian C & Janny M

"Finally, something's big in this apartment and it's not Shawn." - Brian C

"Yeah it is. Do you wanna see?" - Shawn R
regarding the previous quote

"Yeah, she'll show them to me but I'm not allowed to touch them." - Shawn R

"What's in your pants? It's hurting me." "My phone... my cock..." "Naw, that wouldn't hurt... too small." - Janny M & Brian C & Shawn R

"Is that what you do with it?" "Uh, probably not." - Janny M & Paul H
he had a sushi filled with eggs so he put the eggs on other things

"The word 'f**k' is definitely required when talking about Internet Explorer." - Paul H

"I don't even like ice cream." "Why? It's free." - Shahnaz D & Mike R

"Mafia doesn't go to Dead Sea." - Asim A

"Two pi... They're playing Black Jack." "This is a comedy." - Janny M & Shawn R
the hangover

"You're just as annoying." "That's not true." "Yeah, you're right. He's way better." - Janny M & Jen R & Brian C

"He did the right thing. He burned Texas." - Janny M
watchmen

"Kill it." "With what? With our food?" - Jen R & Janny M
there was a spider on the gas tank of the grill

"The smallest of a lot of things is yours too." - Brian C

"Like I said last night, you married me." "I ask myself why everyday." - Jen R & Shawn R

"I'm not special like that." "Oh, you're special." - Jen R & Shawn R

"I'm not a logical person." "We know." - Jen R & Janny M & Shawn R
last part said at the same time

"My headache won't go away." "Mine will at around 10 tonight." - Jen R & Brian C
when jen is leaving

"You bought another Transformer?" "I bought two." "Do they have penises too?" - Janny M & Shawn R

"She wants to dance with someone who just put their entire hand in the cake?" "Shut up and watch." - Janny M & Shawn R
transformers 2

"I love this guy." "The dog? Yeah, the dog is cute." - Shawn R & Janny M

"What's crowded?" "I don't f**king know, I'm drinking a beer." - Janny M & Shawn R
jen was complaining something was crowded

"Jen, how would you like it if we took your toy and threw it in your face?" "She probably wouldn't do anything with it." - Brian C & Shawn R
ohhh!

"That's the penis robot." - Shawn R

"Forty years and we haven't done a single thing since." "That's not true. We did clothes Leslie." - Janny M & Brian C

"There's already too many 'to's'." - Dimitri D

"Sixteen friend requests... Get me to the requests!" - Dimitri D
facebook

"Just put this guy into the Earth." - Ernie A
a photoshop picture

"The orgy-gami... Japanese videos." - Dimitri D
a mix between orgy and oragami

"I don't know what it means if you park in an out of order thingy next to a police man." - Ernie A
the parking meter was out of order

"Sometimes I make noises when I move my chair." - Ernie A

"Is somebody sitting here?" "Oh, you are." - Waiter At Raku 7/22/09 & Dimitri D

"She knows that I'm a threat, right?" - Ernie A
a threat to eileen

"Me, I have low self esteem." - Dimitri D
why he's still working

"That's not classy at all... Just leaving your tags on the letters." - Ernie A

"You give such great pen." - Ernie A
dimitri was blowing on my pen trying to get it to work

"Okay, say something funny so I can... type it in..." - Janny M
i had to txt myself since my pen wasn't working

"How would you smell strawberries from your ear?" - Janny M

"Say something else so I don't waste a text." "Poop." - Janny M & Ernie A

"He looks like he could put it down." - Ernie A
talking about howard

"She got her pen back, holly s**t." - Ernie A
pen started to work later

"He just said, 'so what, I get up on my grandma'." - Ernie A
dimitri, grandma, nough said

"I'm not going back up that dark shaft." - Dimitri D
the lights were off in the stairway

"Even the smurfs got fricken wet." - Brian C
his boxers

"Oh my God. She actually let me touch them!" - Shawn R
jen let him touch something

"I don't understand why it had to have this little... wrinkle..." - Stacy M

"Why don't you just get a rubber mallet?" "Why don't you just get a rubber face?" "I've thought about it." - Stacy M & Janny M

"Dah, I just got done deleting all your text messages!" - Janny M
dude wouldn't stop talking

"We pay our employees... that's a positive work environment." "I don't know why." - Mike R & Shahnaz D

"If you don't want your dick to dangle then wear a supporter." - Dimitri D

"Sounds like a Saab story to me." - Janny M

"I'm tired of just licking and licking and licking." - Jen R

"Now I want to bite." - Jen R
her ice creame

"I really don't want to hear about trimming your bush." - Shawn R
bri needs to trim the bushes in the front lawn

"Me and Brian are going to be in the bedroom..." - Shawn R
he actually said this normally, not joking

"Could you quit making the fallen masturbate?" - Shawn R (pic)

"You've had like five shots of blue wave vodka." - Shawn R

"I was just sitting in it." - Shawn R (pic)
his chair broke

"She was staring at your tits." "What tits?" - Shawn R & Jen R

"She caught a fifteen inch bass." "I'm sure as soon as she did she said 'I wish Shawn was this big'." - Shawn R & Brian C
jen

"You were petting me like a dog and calling me a dog... And now you're doing it again." - Shawn R

"The body's very interesting... especially my body." - Dimitri D

"I'll just try that... if that doesn't work then I'll just shoot myself." - Janny M

"Hope you had a great weekend... Get back to us... Bitch." - Mike R
everything's down!

"God, I got a big nose." - Aunt Ruth

"As you get older, your nose gets bigger." - Aunt Ruth

"Oh, no, the two little pillows." - Aunt Ruth (pic)
bri got the big pillow

"Yes, N... N as in Nancy... N as in... something else." - Brian C

"Put this back in there... I'll take it when it's not Fourth Of July." - Uncle George
something illegal

--RESTRICTED QUOTE--

"You look like you're going fishing." - Uncle George
patrick kept pulling away when he was trying to light his sparkler

"He's gonna take out my cable!" - Kim Mo

"E for idiot." "That's I." - Uncle George & Kim Mo

"It is fun... until someone gets hurt." - Kim Mo
classic

"I hold the record for holding it in the hand." - Mason N
bottle rocket

"Keep talking s**t." - Brian Mu
the firework hit the garage

"I got a great idea... Be quiet." - Brian Mu

"I'll show you a little bit more than one fourth Indian..." - Brian Mu

"What's really scary is you're capable of breeding." - Uncle George
mason

"How many you got left?" "A lot." - Mason N & Brian Mu
brian was shooting bottle rockets off at mason

"At least it takes attention away from your bra." "Yeah, that's what I was going for." - Janny M & Stacy M
her suspenders

"Trust me, I'll make suspenders cool again." - Stacy M (pic)

"So in two more years this can be used again." - Stacy M
she found an agenda book with dates